I Got Hung Up on Today!
Posted on November 19th, 2008 by Cynthia D'Amour
I was totally shocked!
Hasn’t happened in a very, very long time - and wasn’t a professional call.
A woman called me wanting advice.
- She heard me speak several years ago.
- Thought I could help her out.
- I took the call.
Seems she was booked to facilitate a chapter retreat.
- Focus: Getting more members involved.
- Issue: She doesn’t know a lot about getting more members involved.
- She’s a facilitator - not a subject matter expert.
So she called me.
At first I thought she wanted to book me to run the retreat.
- “No!” she gasped.
- SHE was doing the retreat.
I asked if she was looking for content or help creating the retreat.
- I wasn’t sure what she wanted from me.
- I didn’t know her.
- What was she asking for?
She blew up, “I can tell you aren’t into this!”
Huh?
“You are not excited about the opportunity to help me!”
- I tried to explain my energy was lower than normal due to being tired from last minute Lazy Leader book stuff.
- She wouldn’t hear it.
“You obviously aren’t interested in this!”
- Click.
- She was gone.
- Just as I was about to point her to ASAE’s Decision to Volunteer work.
Grandma always said you attract more bees with honey than vinegar.
- My hang up caller must have missed the memo.
- I feel sorry for the association she’s going to be working with.
Makes me think of chapter leaders…Do you use honey or vinegar when asking others to help you out?
Filed under: Getting More Members Involved, Savvy Leadership
Though kind of funny, it was disappointing to hear about this incident. Too bad your helpful nature was misunderstood and this person’s goal was so unclear… She was right to look to you as an expert in the area, but I think her path to getting what she wanted was obstructed by cloudy judgment.
Nicely said. Thanks for the kind words re knowing I’m usually helpful.
When she hung up on me I told James I wasn’t quite sure what just happened. Even with low energy I usually project some warmth…
So you asked qualifier questions (not unlike what you train people to do when recruiting volunteers) and she became frustrated that you dared to ask. Seems like she was looking for a mind reader and forgot that we don’t come equipped with a crystal ball.
Just goes to show, people should always be kind to others - now, I bet this gets back to the association she is working for (or at least a hint of it) - not good for her, bravo for you for being who you are and wanting to help her. Sounds like she wanted you to write her script for her.
And, yes, you are a warm person, I’ve never ever seen or talked to you when you didn’t have a smile on your face or in your voice.
A quick chime - What Cathi said & even your emails are smiley!!!
Thanks everyone. My energy was low, my Teflon shield quivered and this got under my skin.
Today I just shake my head - and smile at all the kind words.
You all rock!